Chapter News

The MGABoston: Hello 2018, Goodbye 2017 (in that order)

 

 

That’s right, Boston fans: a brand-new write-up! No, no one’s leaving and as far we know no medios died during the off-season. This is an honest to goodness celebration of badness: the 2018 Leslie Nielsen Classic!

It’s been a while since we’ve reported on the LNC so here's a quick recap of the last 4 years:

Southgate, Southgate, Southgate, not Southgate.

In 2017, a veteran, former Bastards Champion Jon Scully rose to the challenge and dethroned The Hog in an epic indoor putt-off. Unbeknownst to most, Scully had been training for much of the off-season on the lightning fast greens of The Clubhouse Golf & Entertainment (not a typo…so they tell me).

The crushing loss derailed The Hog’s plans to open the Northeast Regional Leslie Nielsen Museum.

The 2018 LNC would be contested virtually at Pine Needles Lodge and Golf Club, a Donald (gofuckyourself) Ross-designed course that has held several LPGA championships and will host the inaugural Women’s Senior Open in 2018.

As the chapter has had some difficulty completing 18 holes of fake golf, a new policy was implemented in 2016: we would count only holes 3-12. In three years, we can happily report that nearly every player has made it through 12 holes in the four and half hour time limit.

While the 2018 field was among the smallest in recent years, the 12 attendees were among the most decorated in chapter history, featuring 8 former winners and a combined 36 titles. On paper, it should have been a battle. And it was…for second place. Four strokes separated the second- and fifth-place finishes, one stroke shy of the five that separated first from second. Wild Hog put on a show that would have made Dame Laura Davies proud.

The Hog shot even par, leaving no question as to this year’s winner. And for good measure, he also took home long drive and closest-to-the-pin honors. An angry Hog takes what he wants.

With little else to go round, the rest of the field was left to console itself with some promising pre-season indoor play, which translates to actual course play about as well as a Presidential speech translates to actual English these days.

Full results:

The 2017 End-of-Season Awards Spectacular!

With the LNC decided, the chapter moved onto the annual end-of-season awards, which celebrated the best, worst, and most mediocre accomplishments of 2017. (Skip to the end for the full video rundown.)

2017 Most Long Drives

2017 Most Closest-to-the-Pins

2017 Lucky Charm

(Guy who played with the most winners)

 

2017 Human Kryptonite

(Guy who brought up his playing partners’ scores the most)

2017 Skull Fucker

(Guy whose playing partners had the most meltdown strokes)

2017 Randy “The Fuzz” Peach

 

Lifetime Underachievement Award

Avg Finish position 2011:               7

Avg Finish position since 2011:    12

Avg Finish position 2017:               16

 

 

$$$ 2017 Chapter Money Winner $$$

In case you missed it, which, thanks to the crackerjack AV support from the folks at The Clubhouse Golf & Entertainment, includes absolutely everyone, you can check out the awards video below.

 

Congrats to all of our 2017 Award Winners and to Wild Hog, who kicked off 2018 in style, with his 4th career LNC victory!

Shake off the rust, Boston Medios. The 2018 season is set begin in late April, assuming that prick Old Man Winter finally calls it quits.