Chapter News

Noah's Arch survives the flood..takes DB in Bmore

It rained for 40 days and 40 nights, or at least it felt like it did
after far too many hours on the golf course in the pouring rain.
The Baltimore MGA contested the Douche Bag Invitational at
Forest Park Golf Course, and history was repeated, as it
rained its ass off for most of the round. Mediocre golf was
only a dream as putts created rooster tails, and hybrids from
the fairways created canonball-like splashes.
Local natives Bill Wyatt and Matt Reaves were unable to
capitalize with their local knowledge of the golf course, and
joined the already crowded group of +100 rounds. Only 3
golfers were able to keep their rounds under 100.
The event turned into the Eric Bomgardner Show as he won
Long Drive, Closest to the Pin, and Gross Award. Apparently
the weather only bothered him a little. Sadly for him, his
display of golfing ability was no match for the sheer flood of
skill put on by Noah….
Noah Kiehle harnessed his namesake, determined to defend
his ‘Douche Bag’ title from last season, and took the torrential
conditions in stride. He rode over the waves of water that
washed down the fairways as if they weren’t even there. He
navigated the ponds on the greens like an experienced
captain, and he hit tee shots like he was an old guy with a
long white beard. No seriously, he hit tee shots like an old
But when the splashes had settled, and soggy scorecards
were turned in, Noah Kiehle had come out on top, again. He
successfully defended his title, and is now twice the Douche
he was when this started.
Here’s hoping he can bring the flood to Chesapeake Bay Golf
Club later this month as Baltimore looks to lay the smack
down on Westchester in the first ever ‘Mason Dixon Cup’.

Event Results

1.Noah Kiehle92$0.93
2.Jeff Simmons94$0.62
3.Eric Bomgardner97$0.52
4.Aaron Hedetniemi104$0.44
4.Chad Gunning104$0.44
6.Bill Wyatt III105$0.34
6.Ian Alexander105$0.34
8.Matt Reaves107$0.26
9.Garland Griswold109$0.21
10.Timothy shannon110$0.15
11.Anthony E. Young120$0.10
12.Mike ClareDNF$0.00

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Panel Of Experts (2)


I won Gross award not Eric, just saying! Only one to break 90 nbd

True douchebag fashion, Noah has a comment!